Maybe a longer wait afterall

Still no word from Jamey (FBIL) about a wedding date, thats not new.

I tried my very hardest tonight to have a cut off date to when it would be too late to wait for Jamey's response. (via text messaging because that's the only way to get some things resolved sometimes with Scott, kinda juvenile but, what can you do)It was a long fighting process. At the end of it all we came up with the plan (well he did, his way or the highway in life). As of right now we kinda decided on April the 10th next year but if Jamey tell us that's a good date like in December or later then we will just have to push back our dream wedding a year. That won't be adequate time to plan nor will there be any vendors or venues available probably in or out of our budget. I am kinda hoping for a July wedding again for various reasons but whatever happens, happens! The thing I am thinking is when a year passes we will be in the same boat. Jamey won't know till right before his next leave once again when he can get time off. So then the cycle will start all over again and then again till he is out of the Army. I support the troops 100%, I don't support the hurry up and wait attitude or the wait and then hurry up attitude of it all.

Organizing and such.

YaY I got a second job! It's nothing frilly or glamorous, It's a job. It's at five Guys (sit down fast food, burger joint) and under 10.00 an hour but it's something. Just enough to pay for groceries and maybe the water bill with a hundred or so left over a month to save myself for the wedding. Basically Scott said there is no money for my hair, make-up, dress alterations, Bridal shower or Bachelorette party. I also want to save for a harpist or quartet for our actual wedding ceremony. While I buy groceries and such, he will have more money to save for the big stuff...lol If we don't get enough saved I am sure I can get a loan for a couple of thousand to pay for the rest. If there's no one to help we have to help ourselves. Even if we get married with a lump of debt!

My wedding mags and papers from various bridal expo's have gotten to a point where they can't get organized looking. Unless I go through them and organize and throw out the unnecessary bulk. I even bought a nice cabinet/side table from goodwill to store everything in but it's beginning to over flow on the top. That's a goal to achieve before Monday hits!

Still no date yet from Jamey. But I don't blame him from not talking to us. We just found out he is getting married now too. He is no hurry or care right now to even think about our wedding date, he is probably thinking of his own right now (if he has set one). I am not mad or jealous so, don't think I am. It's just he almost stopped talking to us. He couldn't even tell anyone of his engagement, everyone had to find out on the internet. We have waited almost 7 months for an answer and nothing yet. I at least want to know if there is no answer yet, like a weekly update or something. Scott and I are starting to get at each other till I just want to ball up and cry! I just want a date already and until one, I can't really be happy.

Salon Alfredo.

So at 6pm tonight my MOH and I went to Salon Alfredo. We received a free facial and a make-up demonstration for a new product line they have there. The make-up is called Glo- minerals and so far I love the product. I had the make-up artist do a smoky look on my eyes, loved it. The problem is she put a shade too dark on my face and when I went into a different light (every light besides the salon) it looked horrible. I also had too much blush on and my lips were pink. I never liked pink lips with darker eyes YUCK! She asked me what kind of coverage I wanted and I said full. What I ment to say was conceal my blemishes perfectly but, please don't make me look like I'm 40 and have globs of make-up on. She full covered me alright my make-up is very visible and thick. Besides the make-up artist herself I love this line. I am still wearing it right now at 12am and it's not itchy and it still looks the same when she applied it. I love Glo-minerals! Maybe, just maybe more then Bare Essentials.

Whats up now!

So...
Nothing really going on in wedding world right now. Sooo sad to say!...lol Just Listening to Imogen Heap and thought I would blog!
Still no date, still no moolah (money). Hey that's life and I am getting over it...lol

I'm still primarily focusing on my weight dropping (well today I am). Was going to start a colon cleanse today to jump start my weight loss but, I have no funds till I get paid again on Friday. So hopefully I will start that on Friday. I am making small goals in order to achieve my ultimate goal. Maybe that will keep me more motivated. My current goal is an 11 lb loss before my birthday. So that gives me a little more than 6 weeks, around 1.75 lbs a week. Again, all you please wish me luck!

My to-do list is still piling up! When we do get the funds and a date, my life for a few months will just go to shit with all the working and planning. I just hope it's worth it in the end. Not meaning Marrying Scott just the wedding the way we are forced to plan it. I am seriously thinking of spazing out and making my own date and start the planning process without anyones approval.

Today my M.O.H and I are hopefully going to a make-up thing at this salon. It's for a mineral line they have. I have no clue on what kind of make up I am going to have for the wedding. I have acne prone skin, my skin in general is soo sensitive. I have yet to wear my ring full time cause my hands are in a mood. (chapped, dry, ichy, red, etc and nothing is seeming to work!) I use Bare Essentials make-up personally but, I do not know of a salon or professional who uses that product and I don't think BA will stay on all day cause it's all powder and I usually have to re-apply during the day currently. Lets see how today goes!

Well thats all for now. Chao!

Weight

So instead of focusing on wedding planning, which I am not. I am going to focus on losing weight and size. As I said before the perfect wedding dress, I bought already, is a size or so too small. If I don't buckle down now I am going to have to purchase another dress before the big day. My goal is just a size or two smaller. Maybe 15 or 20 lbs. For me it will be hard. I come from a long history of trying to be "That Girl" or you know, "A Size Perfect". I know what I have to do, eat better and exercise. I can write a book on it by now but, never can be role model on the subject. So I have decided to actually use the gym membership I purchased months ago. So please wish me luck everyone!

I tried..sorry

My M.O.H finally e-mailed me those dress pictures last night. You know the bridesmaids dresses from Davids Bridal I promised to show. Well unfortunately I can't show them. Either I am too computer illiterate or there's just no way to transfer them from my e-mail to computer to blogger. Probably the first. Sorry ya'll!

Not in the mood.

Two things been bothering me:

1. The fight between my Maid of Honor and I.
2. The wedding date is not set yet.

Well since our fight we have made up. But, it's not the same. We don't talk as much and I feel like we are drifting slowly apart. Since that fight she has made new friends. I was going to even try to switch gyms if it was worth it, to workout with her but she is going to to that with her new friends. So I signed up for this internet group to meet people since, my friends like I had said before are drifting away with their own lives.

We are still waiting on an answer from Jamey if he can get the 10th of April off or not. Time is ticking away and without a date nothing still cannot happen. I have at least one or two vendors calling or emailing me daily and my responses are always sorry no date yet.

It's to a point that I don't really care for this wedding anymore. It's not sparking my interests.( I still want to marry Scott though!) I checked my checklist on this website I subscribed to, two nights ago and I have 43...yes 43 things not checked off yet if my date is going be 4/10. That didn't freak me out or phase me one bit. Even yesterday when I walked into Office Max to purchase something for work I noticed plain invitations and said to myself "Gee we could use these, why stress out looking for the best ones for me when no one else seems to care".

Might have my flower girls!

Only a few people really know this. So I have decided to tell the world. I had a brother once. When I came into this world on November 13th, 1985 he was 11. So when I was 7 he was gone. He moved to another state and basically I figured he just moved on with his life. Yes my mother and him talked frequently and yes there were a few visits of sorts but, besides that I don't think I had ever talked to him on the phone. Never thought he cared to. Well next week, six years ago is the anniversary of his death. If I didn't have a bad enough Week already by fighting with my bff about the wedding and work related issues, his anniversary is coming up during my vacation week!

Well now done with the sappy prelude. I talked to my ex-sister in law last night for about 2 hours on facebook chat. Since she had requested me to be her friend out of the blue. This would be the first time we have actually said more then hi or by to each other. I had asked her if my nieces could be the flower girls and she was very delighted. So much that she was looking for a plane ticket right then at 12 in the morning. I insured her to wait till we had a definite date and she got the save the date notices. I just hope she doesn't get mad that my nephew doesn't get to be the ring bearer or anything cause Scott has chosen his godson Joey. I also hope she doesn't get too excited then backs down a couple months later. I would understand if it was because of money. Thats 3 kids and 2 adults plane tickets (yes she's remarried) from Texas.
Now this is a great plateau to overcome. I'm super excited about her saying yes. I was to begin to worry about that little detail...lol

Bridal Expo problems

So yesterday was the bridal expo at Germain Arena. I had asked my MOH to come with me last week or so. At first she was hesitant because it cost 5 dollars. I already know I am going to have to plan and pay for my bridal shower and bachelorette party all by myself, but come on 5 bucks. She finally said yes. Told Scott I finally got her to do something with me, he said please get a back up cause you know how she is. So I asked my mother if she bailed if she would come and she said yes.

O.K... So yesterday came. I was scheduled to get off at 1pm. My MOH wanted me at her house at 1. I said can I go home a get ready first... She said and I quote " I am a planner and I planned dinner out @ 5 or 6, don't have time for you to be late. The expo was 1 to 5, she needed to swing by her gmas house to pick up her son and I needed to swing to my parents house also. They are in San Carlos Park both of them. It takes 40 minutes to get home from there. So basically we had like an hour for the expo. She didn't have the decency to spend time with me. She's my MOH if I want a whole or Half of a day with her every week or other week then she should be willing. She wanted the position soo badly and now she wont step up?

I was going to have my long time friend (17+ yrs)be it but she lives in Gainsville and she has became very distant and wont talk to me about anything anymore so I changed me mind. I had like a few others on my mind to be bridesmaids but haven't asked them yet cause I have only known them for a few years. I'm not a loser that find anyone. Most of my friends have moved to far away places over the years so, I don't think they will even be able to make it to my wedding let alone be in it.

After the blow-up with my MOH I was pissed. My replacement at work came late and instead of leaving early I left on time. So couldn't make it to my MOH house by 1pm.

Anyways, My mother was my back-up for the Expo. Since I didn't remind her on Friday, she had forgotten about it and made plans. Well her Sunday plans are always to cook for my dad and g-pa or they get mad, so I don't blame her for forgettening. When I told my mother of what happened so far that day, she gave in and said lets go. I'm getting sick of having to act like I was 10-16 and cry and say nasty things to get my way. I'm grown now and want to simply ask and have a simple yes or no. I did that first but because I was so mad the brat came out. I said no I'll go by myself, you really don't want to come anyways. I drove there crying, walked in with an hour to spare. I saw like 8 or 9 couples I knew there and I freaked!!! Just freaked...maybe because I was alone and I absolutely hate being alone! Especially in a public place. I took some brochures and ran out the door!!! Went to my parents house had a great dinner and some drinks to calm down.

Oh and I ended up talking to my g-pa about school last night and he asked why I wasn't still Attending since I don't have a degree yet. I replied I have been changing majors so much I have wasted too much time. I told him I really want to be a teacher now and that's final. I also told him If I had the money I would go with no interruptions. All he said was oh ok. I thought I was so close for School money. My father even thought I got far cause that's like the first convo we have had in weeks/months. Yeah wedding money would be great but school money is even better!

O.M.G-The start to craziness!

About two weeks ago I myspaced my soon to be brother in law because my fiancee wouldn't and he told me to do it. I asked him once again to please give us a date. Today he called Scott and we came up with April the 10th. It's not set in stone, Jamey (bro. in law) still has to get it approved.

This is where the O.M.G comes in-April! That's three months earlier than planned. Now I have to adjust my to-do list dates. NOW is the time to finalize our venue, and put down a down payment. With what money? We have about $200 saved give or take. Right now I wish I was Cinderella and had a fairy god mother to sprinkle down 2k to help us through the rough start but, I know it won't happen. When I was 20 my grandfather told me he would pay for my wedding, if I got married after I turned 21 and here I am 23 now, I think it was an empty gesture/promise. Anyways, a month or so ago he asked "When is the wedding?" and I said "When we get the money" and he was like "ok...so never?". I asked my parents to remind him of such statement and they were like no, you do it. I have tried to a few times but it's never the right time. Scott and I are going to have to really buckle down and not spend a penny extra. This means again postponing me going back to college till after the wedding. I am not liking this at all but, it is what I have to do.

Me and my M.O.A have some real stuff to start doing also. This week coming up we have to talk to florists and such to check out pricing before my vacation on the 30th. plus I have to Spring-Summer clean my house. It needs it. This all before vacation.Crazytown is just around the corner. All for now, more soon to come! TTYL!

Thinking

With all wedding crap aside, I have been thinking A lot about life in general today. My whole life. Where I came from and where I am today. If you would of asked me where I would be 10 years ago, at this point in my life I would have been married and have a kid, been done with college and have the house of my dreams by now. I don't have any of that yet. The good thing is I am still alive and 99% healthy so that's a good thing. Realized my dream of becoming a Nurse is unrealistic cause the job requirements I wouldn't be able to perform. So going onto plan B and becoming a Teacher. I love children to death and I have a desired to better people and I am very wacky and fun loving, so I know I would be perfect for the job. In the Spring I will hopefully start School once again if I can scrape up the money, this time for teaching. It took me Five years and 4 careers paths to find out teaching was right for me. Plus in the summers when I am off I can study Art, Photography, languages, and travel far away with friends since Scott has no desire to leave the country.

I Think I will put planning on hold for a bit till after my vacation. I have a lot of house organizing and cleaning to do. I also have to get a game plan rolling to lose weight for the wedding. I think I have like 15 to 20 pounds to lose and I eat like Michael Phelps...lol I have to become focused. some days I just think I have A.D.D but I have to start a plan and stick to my guns!

Should we buy a house first???

So I finally got some kind of response out of Scott about our money situation. A few months ago I had an idea of buying a house first before we get married. First, to have a house to come to after we get married and two, for the 8,000 dollar tax credit to go towards the wedding that ends on December 31st of this year! Mainly for number two of coarse! I mentioned the house thing again the other night and he thought I had one good idea ( I always have good Ideas what is he talking about). The problem is when we looked into it months ago it was a no go of coarse ( nothing ever works out for Ashley does it!). If it was this time 3 years ago I was pre-qualified for a Mercedes for god sakes just by my credit score alone but, since then shopping, parties, and pleasure got the best of me...lol Needless to say my credit sucks and Scott's does even worse from money issues after his divorce a few years back. The situation is this he has the job that makes decent money and I just barely make the credit score. We are not married so it was a no go. In the next week I am going to try to figure this all out. The main goal is to try to fix Scotts credit and fast because all I can do is what I have been doing and pay my cards off slowly. Going through a program for me at this point would hurt me not help me.
Another idea like I said in previous blogs is for me to get a second job. After we go on vacation on Aug. 30th YaY! I will start applying immediately. After we set a date and of coarse pick a permanent venue ( I keep looking and changing my mind weekly at this point) we can set the actually budget. All I can say is if it's not the one I already posted then I will have a sell of all my belongings...lol...Just kidding!


Odds and end of the week....
Talked to that old friend I mentioned before about the photo, florist, dec, etc.... and she said just do some plain old research to find the right price for me. She didn't tell me anything top secret just research them. All I can say is thanks to her with her kind words of encouragement. If it's in my budget she will definitely get an invite. Today I have started the wedding day essential search once again and this time with faith in myself I have found some good prices to start with!

Updates...

I talked to Scott sort-of last night about our budget he said don't worry about it right now. He asked me why I was getting so worked up over our savings and budget. I knew it! It seems to me that he is avoiding the whole budget thing. I just want to know how much we can save each month is that so much to ask?

Anyways, I have been talking to an old friend from Middle School hear and there about planning since she is a wedding planner. Weird who will talk to you in different times in your life. I still have all of our notes we passed in our 7th grade science class...lol I played soccer with her and I think a little bit of softball too she's one of the people I can mention to my father when he asks about ''sports buddies" (as he calls them) that he remembers, since he can never seem to remember any of my close friends names...lol Well getting back on topic. She keeps saying she can save me a load of money. How can she save me money when she wants to get paid too? She just mentioned a place on Facebook today. I looked it up the picture looks good, that's all I know about the place. It has sparked my interests because it's in Naples and since the I kinda wanted to get married in the church I sometimes attend and that's where I live. The Colonial Country Club is a good solid hour from my church. It wouldn't even be a possibility to be wed in the churchthere and then have to drive to the reception an hour away. The CCC has no extra charge to hold a ceremony. So there's plus and minus's to everything. I feel as I am being too picky but, DAMMIT I have never had anything in my life go excactly the way that I want it to go and this time it's going to, even if it kills me.

About 6 weeks ago me and my Matron of Honor went to Davids Bridal to look for bridal party dresses. Found like 5 I really like and I'm only having 3 in my wedding. So basically whatever dress within those 5 that looks the best on each girl will go. I will post picks of her wearing them at a later date.

No Money

S0...
Went through my finances today. It doesn't look good for the wedding of my dreams. I'm a realistic girl most of the time. I actually thought in a year or so Scott and I would be able to save up 10k for a wedding. I'm not looking for a big thing, just something decent that I could be proud of you know. We are strapped as it is with no savings. I guessimated Scott's income and its more than mine so I thought he could save most of it. When I actually sat down and figured the numbers it was a no go. It made me curl up with my two dogs and cry on the couch for about 20 minutes or so. I am looking for a second job just for wedding saving money. The bad thing is Scott is not and he never will be looking for extra income. If we both had a second job even for an extra two shifts a week each my wedding would be a reality. I am the one setting the budget and he is the one enforcing it sort-of. Does he really know we can't afford it or is he just avoiding the whole process till it's too late?
The worst thing of it all is we still only have an estimation on the date sometime in July of next year. We are still waiting on his brother to give us a date. I recently found out his leave from the Army is like a vacation it rolls around 2 weeks after every November unless he is deployed and he wants to take it right before his deployment. So right now I feel most of my Wedding is not up to me, I'm not in control, not even enough control to be compromising with Scott. No control at all.....

Colonial Country Club!!

So, I think I have found a venue to hold the wedding and reception. It's the Colonial Country club. It was one of the adds in all of the bridal magazines I have been purchasing for months now that stood out, it twinkled above the rest. I've looked at few places on my own and a couple of weeks ago we went to the Naples Hilton but, it was way too pricey. Scott and I visited the C.C.C sometime last week and we were both hooked. It's beautiful. Everything is included from the bar all the way to a gourmet cake. I mean the cake they have there is from Masons Bakery and I heard it's the go to for cakes when he mentioned that I was instantly hooked. Once we get a date set and 1500 for a deposit to save the date we will be on our way to a new life together.

First 9 months.

To catch up on the past 9 months of my wedding planning charades here goes:

Within a few days of the proposal my maid and honor and I went to a local boutique to look at wedding dresses with no luck. We had to have a darn appt. So that following week my mother and I went when I had one. Since I have been looking online at dresses for over a year just waiting for this day to come I was prepared with a list and pictures. A few hours and 15 dresses later I found the perfect one. Paying for it was not easy and about three months later and a lot of heart ache my mother pulled through and surprised me by paying for it with all my assesories.

In late November we took Engagement/Christmas Pictures at JCPenneys, they turned out rather decent I say. We sent them in with all of our Christmas cards announcing our engagement.

Since then, I started looking into venues and such for the wedding itself and reception. We found out that our original Budget of 5k is not going to cover the wedding that I would prefer. So with a lot of consideration we are trying to up it to 10k if anyone in our families would lend some decent $.

We still do not have a date set. Scotts brother has recently joined the United States Army. Since he is so close to him, I wanted to set a date convenient for him. Some days I just want to give up and walk right into the court house and say our "I do's" and ironically Scott won't let us. Scott isn't the romantic type and he's sort of a hill billy so he's cheap on everything but, deap down inside he wants me to be happy and he knows I have been dreaming of this day since I was 10. It's hard to organized anything untill an official date has been set as every bride to be knows that is the ultimate "first step".

How he proposed...

The date: 11-13-2008
Place: A Marco Island sailboat. (Cool Beans)
Event: My 23rd Birthday

Scott told me a week before, that he had a big surprise for my upcoming birthday. That's when I figured the only thing it could be was a proposal. I told my Mom, close friends, and some random people at work what was about to happen. What I didn't know was how it was going to happen. He had told me the day before to get off of work early so I did. He wouldn't tell me how to dress or what to bring so I had no clue on the whereabouts of our destination. When we arrived we only had seconds to spare before departure, and boy was I ever surprised (since he knows I have never stepped on a boat before). We were not the only ones on the Sail boat, besides the captain there was 4 old lady's that were vacationing in Naples at the time that grew up together moved to different states but always stayed friends, like one of my favorite movies( Now and Then). Anyways, getting back on subject. We were on the boat for about an hour or so and me having 3 glasses of champagne when he had popped the question, everyone had moved to the front of the deck by then since they had an idea on what was about to happen. He didn't kneel down to one knee or anything (I think because we weren't alone), he just reached in his pocket and said "Will you marry me" and of coarse I said YES.